The Bliss of Brokenness

Overwhelmed. Overwhelmed by all the little problems that keep arising, yet overwhelmed by the amount of support I have been receiving. Overwhelmed by the amount of work that needs to get done before I leave (…while doing well on my finals…), yet overwhelmed by God’s goodness.

Although this overwhelming feeling makes me want to break down into either tears of joy or tears of sadness almost all the time, I am learning that this is the perfect place to be.

I have noticed that on every trip I’ve gone on, I have had a point of brokenness, a point where I simply could not handle everything. But these points are the times where I had to be completely dependent on God. All too often we are able to do it all on our own. We are completely independent, and look to God for guidance when we feel we need it.

Being completely dependent on God looks messy. For me, being completely dependent on God means crying out to Him every morning for strength and wisdom and praying earnestly to Him every hour of every day. Being completely dependent on God means that reading my Bible everyday is a necessity. And being completely dependent of God often means crying when my head hits the pillow at night.

Being completely dependent on God makes you feel vulnerable. But, you see, God desires us to be at this point, in this point of brokenness, because this point is where His glory can truly shine. This is the point where He can do more than we could ever ask or imagine. For at this point, although we feel weak, we are truly strong.

As I leave for Guatemala on Monday, I leave feeling a tad broken and a little frazzled. But if I had it all together, I know I wouldn’t be completely dependent on God. So although it is messy, there is no place I’d rather be. Please pray that Bekah and I would be safe in our travels, and that God will show us where and how we need to spend the time we have there. Thank you so much for your continued love and support!